Plato and Diogenes

[sdi]

Socrates had a vast number of students, but two of them stood head and shoulders above the rest. Plato was the son of two of Athens' most noble families, and taught in a purpose-built school on land sacred to Athena which he inherited. While the school was technically open to anyone, in practice it was a society of aristocrats. Antisthenes was only half-Athenian, since his mother was from Phrygia. For his own part, he took this in stride, saying that the mother of the gods (Cybele) was from Phrygia, too. Because he wasn't a full citizen, he couldn't own land in Athens; as such, he took to teaching in the temple of Heracles, which was a public gymnasium called Cynosarges. Again, while he would gladly teach anyone, in practice his students were drawn from the lower classes. Both men carried on their great teacher's legacy, but in very different ways: Plato emphasized his contemplative, epistemological side; Antisthenes his active, ethical side. Plato's school became known as the Academy, and he remains the most famous person associated with it. Antisthenes and his followers became known as the Cynics, after the gymnasium; but his student, Diogenes, took the name to heart and became so celebrated that the name became synonymous with his own. Many stories are told about Plato and Diogenes because of their diametrically opposed visions for living well. I've already told a couple of them, here are a few others.

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True to his wealthy upbringing, Plato was fond of luxury. Diogenes, on the other hand, eschewed all possessions, following Socrates when he said that "the gods need nothing, so the one who is most like them is the one whose needs are fewest." After years of experimentation, he had settled on a cloak and staff, a coarse imitation of Heracles' lion skin and club.

An admirer of Plato's had given him a fine cape, and he wore it as he showed some guests around town. Diogenes spotted them in a marketplace, and tore the cloak off of Plato, and stomped it into the dirty street. "Thus I trample on the empty pride of Plato!" he shouted, to the laughter of those around.

Plato answered him patiently, "Yes, Diogenes, and how proud you are of it."

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Plato and his students, in working out his Theory of Forms, would spend a lot of time trying to determine how many categories it takes to distinguish one type of sensible thing from another, in an effort to see if one can determine just how many Forms were needed to explain the things we see in the world. After much refinement, Plato finally settled upon a definition of man that required only three categories: "Man is an animal which has two legs and is featherless." He was much praised for the definition.

This didn't sit well with Diogenes, who considered it a pointless waste of time. He took a chicken, plucked it, and brought it to the Academy, shouting, "Behold, Plato, I have found your man for you!"

Plato quietly revised his definition to include "...and has broad, flat nails."

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Usually, Diogenes was in desperate want of food, but he would nonetheless use this as a tool of criticism. Once, he asked Plato for a fig, received an entire amphora of them, and said, "Why should I expect otherwise from Plato, who would use a thousand words when a few would do?"

Plato was wise to this, though. On another occasion, with great solemnity, Diogenes offered Plato a fig. Plato figured that Diogenes expected him to refuse it and had a witticism prepared, so he said, "Thank you, I will take your fig, and your joke, too."